Why do most newly married Indian women hate their mother-in-law?
Many newlywed Indian women or daughters-in-law find it challenging to live with their in-laws, even if they have not been treated harshly. There can be many variables to this including privacy, unnecessary taunting, rules & rituals, and reluctance to support them financially and so on.
The word mother-in-law in itself is so harmful to newly married Indian women because every mother-in-law makes life so tough for a daughter-in-law who just wants to be liked as they because Indian culture is such that no one can fathom. And there are countless factors that go untold that make a mother-in-law hateful. Some of the common Saas-Bahu things are given below:
Limitations in the Kitchen
A mother-in-law who would manage her home according to her own rules is always present when a newlywed woman enters the kitchen. As your mother-in-law knows your husband’s tastes better than you do, thus you can’t make things to suit your own preferences. You won’t have the opportunity to demonstrate your own style, and you can’t even argue against it. Due to such limitations, you lose your interest in cooking, sense of style and taste.
- Privacy issues are not for a single room there are a lot of things that bother you. You simply can’t be on your own even a single day.
- You can’t wear something you like because you won’t feel comfortable, not because your in-laws won’t like it.
- You can’t just cuddle up on your husband’s lap or watch the movie while doing so.
- Even talking, fighting or laughing openly with your husband does not look good for them, and if you do so they start to judge you in the same manner.
- If you are going out, anytime you wish to be late, you must present a valid reason for the same.
- You’ll eventually quit since there are times when we genuinely have no good reason.
- You cannot freely converse on the phone with your own parents in their presence.
- You are not permitted to address your husband by his name or any other name in front of your in-laws.
- You’ll need to respect your personal space in your bedroom.
There will always be room for comparison with others, no matter what you do. You can ignore treating her as your own mother some days, but other days you won’t be able to.
Different ways of thinking
Differences in opinion will be a big factor in the hatred between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. No matter how nice or kind your mother-in-law is, she will always believe that she is right and that her way of doing things is always the best. A mother-in-law who has been managing the household for a long time could feel superior and try to impose her standards on the daughter-in-law. Like when certain tasks need to be completed, and everything must follow to mother in laws decision.
Questioning about jobs and other small matters
There may be no perfect time to work. Your career can be very time-consuming as there is no right time to work or late evenings are very common. Instead of supporting the daughter-in-law’s career, it is normal for the mother-in-law to criticize, humiliate or ridicule her work.
Pressure to Have a Baby Soon
Every mother in Las intends to put pressure on her daughter-in-law to become pregnant. Due to this pressure, they want to adopt them despite the fact that she may not be mentally prepared. Before having a child, numerous financial considerations must be made, and it’s unlikely that the daughter-in-law will fall pregnant due to her mother-in-prodding.
Imposing Religious Beliefs
A girl who adheres to a different culture or set of religious values is compelled to do so by her husband’s family. This action is totally wrong. Even the Indian Constitution guarantees everyone the right to practice their religion freely, and no mother-in-law can restrict this.